What am I doing here?

My best friend has gone to China to teach conversational english for a year.
I've only just seen her but I can't help but miss her. We haven't spent a whole lot of time together in the last 5 years. Only a few days together every six months to a year.
I'm happy for her though. I hope that she finds joy in her new adventure. From the sounds of her blog, she already is.

My job for the school year has started up again. I learned that someone I used to be friends with freshman year is teaching at the elementary school I facilitate after school childcare at. It made me feel sheepish to come to the realization that I'm still in school while many of the people my own age have graduated college and moved on to their life careers. And for a short moment, it had me wondering whether I wasted my time goofing off instead of getting my career on track.

On the other hand, I quickly came to the understanding that I have had many life experiences that many others don't have because I made the choice to hold back on school for a quarter here and there so that I could do something that I would truly enjoy. Being a snowboard instructor at Mt. Baker for example. There is no way I could have gotten good grades while battling the thought that I was missing out on a good pow day. So, many times I just said to myself, "Fuck it. Take the quarter off." And you know what? I don't regret it for a minute.

Through out the last few months I have become aware of the fact I will be in school for a really REALLY long time. If I want to go forth and get a masters in Geology as well as in teaching, (after I finish my Bachelors of education in Earth science, then start teaching at a high school of coarse), I shouldn't be concerned with how long it takes for me to finish this task. I have a set goal, and I will accomplish said goal. It is the journey that I should appreciate. I want to take advantage of my youth, not to spend my time in a building all day, but to gain life experience in a diversity of activities and life accomplishments. With my time off, I have taught 9 year olds how to shred the mountain gnar, been a nanny to wonderful young children, worked terrible hours slaving away in a stock room, traveled down the coast and across the country, and learned how to shred on water.

This is more than I could have ever asked for. Thank you universe for giving me the opportunity to have such an amazing and beautiful life.

I may have hard days and a down attitude sometimes.
But I truly do love this life.

All smiles at the Y

When I got to "work" yesterday, (I call it "work" because, really, I love it too much for it to be considered a "job"), the kids were outside playing on the playground. On Wednesdays, they have early release at 1, and I have my own classes til 2 so I go in after that. Anywho, they were on the playground playing and having a grand ol time being kids.

On every other day of the week, I go in before school gets out and I set up the gym with tables and other stuff. When they get out of class, most days, they're supposed to do homework if they have it, and read if they don't have homework. This only lasts for about a half an hour, then we go outside. I swear to you, they think the first half hour is torture for them. I feel like I'm constantly telling them that it's homework and reading time every 5 minutes. The older ones are generally pretty good at being quite and doing their thing. But the younger ones, man. The kindergartners are a rough crowd. I've been working on teaching them how to read (and most of them are pretty good readers by now). But when you have 7, 5 year olds to teach how to read in a group, it's hard to keep their focus on you and not each other. Don't get me wrong, I love teaching them how to read, and everything about this job, but sometimes... sometimes it's hard.

Anyway, my point is that yesterday, when I walked onto the playground, it just put the biggest smile on my face. They were having so much, care free, fun. And then, when they finally noticed I'd gotten there, a handful of them ran up to me in excitement, and gave me a big group hug.

Moments like that make the tough times worth it.